Tragic Ends VS Bad Ends, Trigun Flavor

[procreation]

CW: mildly Plantcesty bc of canon end events but mostly toxicity, mindfuck, extreme codependency and.... co-parenting?

Somewhere in the sands is a tall person traveling on bare feet, a cloak of galaxies and roots covering their face from the sun. Vash moves slowly, not because he's tired or struggling, but because he's not really in a hurry. He doesn't get tired anymore, or hungry. Just weak, sometimes, but he's always been weak, hasn't he? That's why his brother has to protect him.

So this place couldn't be bad, because Knives would never leave him somewhere bad.

He stops briefly to collect a bleached skull left in the sand, picking it up with the roots and wisps of shadow and then holding it with the curiosity of a detached scholar rather than a compassionate man. Human, by the looks of it. Not killed by one of their brood, just unlucky in the desert.

Shrugging, Vash lets it drop into the sand again like an unwanted piece of trash and lets all those roots and glimmering energy unfold around him. He makes a little seat for himself, black flowers with shiny blue specks acting as cushions as the rest of his cloak peels away for a canopy. The dark undersuit is an echo of his brother, including the sturdiness of four perfectly fine limbs.

No memories were left, physical or otherwise. Sometimes you just have to remake your little brother to make him understand your point of view, and Vash... doesn't really know any better, anymore. It's fine, all he needs to focus on is making new Independents.

The roots continue to stretch over the sand, slithering over the area to see if they can pick up anything other than old bones of a doomed race.

Comments

[procreation]

[ The 'flirting' makes Vash's face scrunch up in disgust, spine stiffening. No playful smack or half-hidden smiles, no hint of ruddiness or fake-embarrassed squeak - just outright revulsion at the very idea. As if the shower stain in a dilapidated bathroom had come up to a person and hit on them.

Then it says things like 'caring' about him, and something about a mom. Vash didn't have a mom, it was always him and Nai against the world. Whatever this ghost was trying to do, all it managed was to confuse him. If it had been a physical body, Vash would have slashed it apart long ago so he didn't have to hear anymore bullshit.

When the tone finally changes, it's honestly a relief to hear horror in those words. ]

What? He wouldn't. We've made so many together by now, and the new ones are still growing inside. He wouldn't leave me here to go into some light, so stop lying.

[ Vash needs to find out what the fuck this was all about, and soon. He had heard the sisters, of course. Something about someone turning red... but he wasn't allowed in the plant rooms any more to heal them, so he can't really help. ]

[el_llorono]

[Nope! Nope double nopety NOPE nope fuck that! He felt his literal entire being give a full-body shudder and had to shake it out of his limbs, and he just knew, if he'd still been alive, he would have just been physically ill. It had been bad enough, growing up in the orphanage and seeing the children who were dealing with families that had done that to them before someone had stepped in and rescued them from that Hell. But none of them had sounded like this, talked as if the whole thing was...was...!

And none of them had been a walking, talking mockery of the sweetest, kindest man he'd ever met, the man he would have gladly spent the rest of his life with if he'd been given the chance to live a normal life!

The revulsion and rage at his expense was intense, and he had to take a moment before he could compose himself, to try and separate himself from the whole scenario and not flip right the fuck out like he desperately wanted to do. But then the sad, brainwashed fucker accusing him of lying snapped the thin veneer of control he had on his temper.]

Chingar a su madre! Do you even hear what you're saying? No puedo creer que esté escuchando esto ahora mismo! Pinche pendejo! [He didn't even realize he was slipping between languages, his voice rattling off in a barely-comprehensible, horrified mumble of syllables.] You think I'm lying? I've lied about a lot of shit, Blondie, but I'm more serious than I am dead right now! Want me to prove it?

[And maybe if it would get through whatever fucked up shit this man's brother had done to him, he could be done with this entire horrifying scene and go home! He lunged in, phasing through the vines surrounding him and gritting his teeth around the seering pain it caused, and his hands became physical, reaching out to grab his head with one hand, grasping onto a flowered vine with the other, and put every single bit of his energy into projecting his thoughts out at him, his memories, and praying to whatever called itself God that they would work the same as the feathers on the Plants where he was from.

Rem, Knives, watching them walk into the light, squabbling with Vash, laughing with him, following him through the sand, unseen, unheard, but loving him still after so many years, mourning silently with him when someone died, and even more recently, meeting the version of him that looked the most like this one, with his unruly mop of hair, his too-big glasses, sad and sweet and soft-spoken and kind, loving him too, because how could he do anything but love them?]

Your brother's a monster!

[Translation: "Mother Fucker!" "I can't believe I'm listening to this right now! Fucking asshole!"]

[procreation]

[ The anger, the swearing, the rage is easier to understand than anything else. That's what humans usually look like when he sees them. Either that or they fall to their knees in prayer, praising the angels of destruction... playing zealots just to stave off their own demise just a little longer.

Maybe some were even serious. Vash has seen more than one of the Eye throw themselves happily into death in the name of Millions Knives.

Still. Rage is easy to deal with, even in the face of someone he cannot render to pieces with a snap of his roots. The empty coldness in those usually warm (if sad) eyes intensify. ]

Worthless creatures should not open their mouths too widely. I'm sure even the dead can be vanquished. [ He snarls - and then the Wolfwood moves. Vash tries to stop it, roots and flowers attempting to block its way, but the bastard phases through them like they do not easily stop armed vehicles.

Then it grabs a root, a starry night flower crushed in its grip and images flashes in Vash's mind. The sound the blonde makes is horrific, like he lost all the air in his lungs and forgot how to breathe.

Then he just... stops and falls over. Unmoving, blue eyes staring into nothing. Breathing, but that's about it. ]

[el_llorono]

[There was so much rage there, but he could handle rage. He almost felt a smug bit of amusement, that he'd pissed him off so bad, whether it was over what he'd said about Knives or everything else. But the lashing and flailing of those roots hurt, burned like electricity coursing through him, and he had to grit his teeth against the scream that still managed to force its way through his clenched jaw.

But then all at once, it stopped. The parts of him that he was phased through still hurt, and he lurched away from them the moment he realized that the man had just stopped moving, but...]

Jesus Christ on a fuckin' pogo stick, did that actually work...???

[He groaned as he dragged himself across the sand, close enough that he could reach out and touch him again without getting too close to any of those winding vines, but he didn't dare make contact for a good few seconds, just stared, biting his lip, battling between worry and revulsion for the man in front of him.]

Hey. Hey, buddy, you awake...? God...I don't even know what I'm hopin' for here, but...[He reached out, gently pressing against his face, tapping gently.] I can see you breathin'...Vash...? Needle-noggin, are you...are you in there...?

[procreation]

[ Vash's eyes are clouded over, all the horrors flashing through his mind so wildly that he can't even react. It's too much, and he sees Wolfwood on the ground, speared through one eye by one of his roots. Meryl, crushed by the same.

Hundreds of people, destroyed. Humanity shattering. His very core violated over and over again. His sisters, going red after the first generation is born. The easier way to artificially impregnate and then implant the embryos into his gate to lessen the strain and keep the trauma from hurting more of the plants.

That fact that he has so many of them inside right now. ]

Kill me...

[ He's gone against everything he is. He's torn apart every piece of Rem's legacy. There's no point to anything.

...but the children are innocent. ]

[el_llorono]

[The sound of that voice was so quiet, so broken, he felt his heart breaking, and he didn't think he would have been able to breathe if he'd needed air.]

God, Vash. I...I can't do that. [He probably couldn't even have done it when he was alive, even when he'd wanted to. How did a man kill someone that was damn near a god walking amongst men?

He sighed, sitting near his head and letting his fingers brush against his hair, trying to offer comfort, to at least let him know he was still there, even if he couldn't see him.]

Just...take your time. You got people who'll wanna help, Needle-noggin. You've got friends, you're safe. Just lemme know when you're feelin' up to it, an' I can lead you to 'em. You're gonna be ok.

[Maybe? He didn't know. Fuck, if he were being perfectly honest, probably not. Vash had enough problems as it was. But this...? Wolfwood did not have even the beginnings of what was needed to help with this. Maybe...maybe someone else would.

At the very least, all that talk about...kids...maybe they could do something about...whatever that was. Rem was going to need a much larger house, at this rate.]

[procreation]

Friends? I've killed everyone I ever loved.

[ The words are so, so small, face pale as a ghost and eyes still bleary and unfocused. All Vash can see is flashes of the lives he took, how he enjoyed it. The things his brother did to him.

He's trembling, sick to his very core - and if he still needed to eat, he would have retched until he spit blood. Vash's soul is crushed, he's not going to come back from this. How do you come back from dooming humanity he used to love with his whole heart? Willingly, eager to see them all eradicated?

He wants to end, he wants to stop all of this. It's not even selfish in his mind, it might even save a few lives. There's nothing he could ever do to fix this. Vash can't, though. He can't even atone that way, because it would make him even more of a murderer.

His gate is full of destruction and innocence in one. ]

[el_llorono]

[He gave a ragged sigh at those words, rubbing a hand down his face.

"Gonna take a wild guess and say that's not your normal Stampede-flavored guilt talkin'. Fuck. What'm I even gonna do with you?"

Because on one level, he knew Vash well enough to know that this? The things he didn't want to make him talk about so he could try and bring him down off of whatever precipice he was on right now? If they were as bad as all his talk and weird, stabby tendencies indicated? This would destroy him. He already lived with a death wish as it was. Killing him would be a mercy.

And that wasn't even touching on the talk of...kids. Because right now, he just couldn't.

But for all his talk in life, about sometimes killing being the best or only option, right now? That was out of his hands. And he didn't know if it made him a coward or a hypocrite, that now that he was staring a version of the man in the face who was finally begging him to do it? Part of him was glad he couldn't.

Still...sitting out here under the desert suns wasn't going to solve any of it.

He sighed to himself, flopping onto his side with a dramatic little huff. He had a feeling they might be out here for a while, the way this guy was talking.

He arranged himself in a somewhat awkward little curl around his head, putting him close enough that he could continue brushing his fingers through his hair and talk without having to expend the energy to talk loudly enough to be heard. Whispering would probably be less grating on the sorry assholes broken mind, anyway.]

This isn't your home. People are alive here, even a version of me. I promise, you're not alone, and people will want to help. [Maybe not the Wolfwood who was still kicking around, no. He was dealing with enough of his own idiot self, and he doubted he'd be willing to kill the guy, either, if all that guilt he'd been ranting about was any indication. But Vash might be able to help. He was a little wary of bringing Rem into the picture, though, until they knew how this one would react. He did not need to add his mother's blood to his hands.]

And if it makes you feel any better, all those people you killed are alright. Take it from someone who knows this side of things. I've been stickin' around longer than I'm supposed to, and pokin' people on your side has been an interesting little side hobby, lately, but once you're gone, things get a whole lot easier. I wasn't lyin' when I said they moved on. People are waitin' for you in Paradise.

[Whatever that was. But he didn't need to tell the man he'd never seen what waited for people at the end of that light. Little white lies, or lies by ommission, certainly weren't the worst thing he'd ever done.]

Either way, I can't do what you're askin' me to do, Vash. Even if I agreed to do it, it's outta my hands. I can barely even touch you like this. So you're gonna need to get up, unless you wanna see how long it takes for one of you t'shrivel away in the suns. And I know for a fact that you can go for months without food and water without dyin'.

[Unless the little vacation Knives had made for Vash on that Ark had included a complimentary meal plan. He doubted it. The man had been wasting away when he'd finally gotten off of his ass and broken him out of there.]

[procreation]

[ Vash barely even hears what Wolfwood is saying, mind rushing with every possible detail of his sins and it's destroying him, opening bleeding wounds in an already bruised soul and tearing at his mind.

Not his home. People alive here. Paradise. None of that is even processed, because just hearing that voice is torture.

Wolfwood. It wasn't the same one he knew, wasn't the same on he killed because there were not to be any loose ends, nothing that could possibly break through his lost memories. The second time he killed a friend. First time he did it on purpose - Meryl was simply in the wrong area at the wrong time.

Wolfwood screaming at him to wake up. Not screaming any more, sunglasses snapped in half and falling to the ground. Nai patting his shoulder and whispering little proud affirmations. Enjoying it.

Enjoying it. ]

Tell people to keep away from me. P-please. I can't... he made me, he made me like it, I...

[ It finally snaps and the scream is animalistic, pure terror to the very core. For other Vashes, it was killing one man that almost broke them. He's killed hundreds personally, and been the catalyst of thousands. ]

[el_llorono]

[There was a few moments of worrying silence, the haunted look on Vash's face as he very visibly let things roll through his head making the hairs on the back of his neck stand up. And then he was talking, already sounding hysterical, and then screaming, and Wolfwood sat up like a bolt, shocked and horrified and, unfortunately, not at all surprised.]

Blondie, hey, Blondie! Come on, you're ok, breathe! Fuck!

[He knows, he knows. He's heard Vash going out of his mind before, he's seen it so many times from both sides of reality, and it's never been like this, and he should have known it was coming. That didn't make it any easier to watch.

He had to do something, he couldn't just leave him like this, alone and broken and out of his God-damned mind! He wanted to help, but how-...how could he possibly...?

Fuck. This...this was going to be unpleasant and possibly really fucking bad for one or both of them. But he didn't see much choice.]

Vash, Vash, Listen to me! I'm gonna try and get you to people who can help, but you're gonna have to trust me! This is gonna be weird, but I promise, it won't be forever, I can't keep it up for very long, and I'm not gonna make you do nothin' you wouldn't want, I promise! Please don't fight me, please!

[He reached down, his hands touching the sides of his head as he curled over him, focusing everything that was Nicholas into a single point of consciousness on the edge of his awareness. Focusing himself, until he could feel the sensation of sand under his bare feet, the heat of the suns on his skin, and the sound of screaming stopped coming from below him and began rattling around inside of his own head. Distorted by flesh and bone, different to his ears than it had ever sounded before.]

Come on, Vash, come on, relax, it's fine, lemme take over, just this once, just lemme help, please!

[It hurt, his whole body like fire, keeping him detached from being able to take full control as he projected his voice into that consciousness that hovered just next to his own, filling the same space, hysterical and deranged and hurting, hurting so much. It hadn't felt like this before, but then he had never tried to possess a Plant before, and for a moment, he became acutely afraid that maybe he'd made a terrible mistake, and he was about to find out what happened if something really, truly harmed what was left of his being.]

[procreation]

[ Vash screams and screams, horribly and drawn-out until it sounds like his vocal chords are tearing apart. He grasps at his head, tearing at blonde hair as his mind strains to hold on to any form of sanity.

The ghost - Wolfwood, god, Wolfwood, the look on his face when he killed him, he killed him, he killed him and he laughed about it, enjoyed it. He's a monster, he's a monster!

Then the panic is suddenly slowed, like his mind is muddled and covered in mud. Vash kind of wants a cigarette for some reason? It's enough to shock him into taking a breath, tasting iron in his mouth and then kind of... letting go. He doesn't fight, he has no mental strength left to do anything, and if he doesn't have to think, if he doesn't have to exist in his head for a little while, it's mercy.

Vash is wide open for Wolfwood to take, even if it might be painful for him to possess a plant - and he's filled with so much energy, not only his own. Vash's last conscious thought for now is all about that, all about them. ]

...the children... they're not ready. They're innocent, they didn't ask to be made. I don't care what you do to me, just don't hurt them inside me.

[el_llorono]

[Everything was screaming and pain and horror until suddenly he felt the body around him gasp and go still, and while the pain didn't fully cease, there was an ebbing to it that made him gasp, the action strange, distorted, and he realized that he had done it immediately after Vash had, and there was no more room in those lungs to fill. He forced himself to remember how breathing worked, and then how to let the body take over and control that for itself, and he rolled over, pushing himself to hands and knees, taking it slowly so that he could remember what it felt like to have physical form.

It was while he was reorienting himself that he heard that final, plaintive plea, and he wasn't sure if it was emotional bleedover from Vash or from his own bleeding heart, but even with the horror of what he was talking about, just the thought of it hurt.]

Vash, buddy-...[Oh, that sounded so weird - his vocal cadence coming out of Vash's vocal cords.] I don't wanna hurt your kids. I don't care what that fucker did to you, they're just kids. I just wanna help, I promise. Whatever...whatever form that takes.

[He waited a few more minutes to really settle into the limbs and get used to the weight before dragging himself to Vash's feet, grimacing at the feeling of what could only be described as electricity rippling unpleasantly through the entire body.

And then he was off, shuffling through the desert and back in the direction of Rem's home, only...not quite. More southerly. He knew the best chance of finding one of the Vashes within a walkable distance would be there, but he absolutely did not want to show this one where to find Mom.]